Monday, June 18, 2018

Paper Invite vs. Evite: The Big Wedding & Event Planning Debate

We review the good and the bad of both paper invites and email invites. But in the end, we suggest the best advice.


Thanks to the explosion of online presence in the past two decades, a whole new plethora of options has transformed the wedding industry. Social media has given weddings a platform to be displayed. Now people can post their wedding design ideas, engagement photos, lavish attire, unique venues, and overall wedding aesthetics. The undercurrent beneath all of this? Comparison and a growing need to impress and outdo the rest.


person writing envelopes
Paper invite vs. e-vite
I felt this phenomena first hand when my close friend and seasoned bridesmaid Vicki came to me and a group of friends for advice. She explained how she was planning the bridal shower and needed to send out invitations. The bride's family was pushing for evites, the online version of an invitation, yet Vicki wasn’t sure. She worried they would seem tacky and rushed and wondered what the guests would think. In the end, Vicki asked the Bride to Be and she said she’d be mortified if e-vites were sent and that she’d pay for the invites herself if it meant avoiding the evites. I shared my own experience with the group about a bride who wanted Evites for her wedding invitations and told them how we received responses within the hour! It made the whole process that much easier and move that much faster. In the group chat, Lindsey countered with “it’s not about how easy or how fast people respond, it’s about caring!” Did evites automatically assume thoughtless and easy? I couldn’t stop thinking about the seemingly small choice and disproportionate dramatic reaction to something as simple as invite vs. evite. Yet this predicament isn’t an uncommon one. Social media fuels decisions like this- keeping the wedding “classy” is more important than ever when your Facebook friends will see.  So let’s pull out the ol’ pro and con list to see if paper invite benefits actually outweigh evites or if the online wedding world has correctly coined evites as tacky and therefore terrible.
invite with flower
Mailed invite



Paper Invite Pros


Weddings are a rare and special occasion. They are carefully planned and executed with focused attention to meticulous detail.  The announcement of such an event should be done in a way that stands out and can be saved and cherished for years to come. There is something very meaningful in opening up an envelope containing exciting news. Not only was this shared with you, but it was addressed and stamped and transported through many hands, possibly across a vast distance to reach your doorstep. There was thought and effort put into this. This mindset is understood when you receive a paper invite. Receiving a paper invitation gives the perception that the event is very important, which it is! Especially since snail mail has become more rare, it’s even more of a signal of importance to receive a paper invite. After opening the invitation, you now have a tangible reminder to RSVP as well as a beautiful keepsake to hang on the fridge.  Seeing the invite everyday hanging on the fridge reminds you to respond in a timely manner and also keeps you excited for the approaching event. There is also such a wide variety of paper invites. The design can really encompass anything you dream up and can have textured add ons like lace and beads. Other popular designs like foil stamping and engraving is something only possible through paper invitations. Additionally, there are so many options for DIY paper wedding invitations if you are a crafty bride. This can make the invite that much more meaningful and exciting to receive.




Paper Invite Cons


It’s called snail mail for a reason. Paper invitations require much more time in order to be made and prepared in addition to the actual snail mail process that ensues after that. Don’t forget that the reverse process must take place for RSVPs to return to an eager bride. God forbid an invite or RSVP gets lost in the mail. Further, the cost of paper invites is typically significant. According to wedding industry survey site theweddingreport.com, the average price for 150 invitations and response cards is $245, and that doesn’t include stamps! For a small wedding or one on a budget, spending a significant amount of money on fancy, custom invites seems frivolous when you can easily spread the word in a cheaper and seemingly equally effective manner.


This simply is an unnecessary allocation of money that could be put to better use in another part of the wedding budget. At the very least you can save some money by doing evites for engagement parties and save the date notices. While not as important or grand as the actual wedding invitation, these smaller wedding activities can be sent in cute evites that may be seen as more acceptable by guests.





Evite Pros


It’s an easy, seamless, cheaper or even free option! Evites are easy to create and send out right away and are especially useful for a quickly approaching event. You can easily upload any engagement photos you may have and find a template that fits your taste. They can be just as lavish and beautifully designed online as a paper version. RSVPs will be collected faster as you skip all of the time consuming steps of snail mail. Additionally, all responses will be organized online for your convenience so you have one less thing to worry about.


But one of the biggest bonuses of Evites are most certainly the low cost. According to Evite, 750 premium invitations cost only $50! Saving money on evites can allow you to spend more money on a great band or more expensive caterer, aka the more enjoyable and memorable experiences. Oh and it’s eco friendly! Etiquette expert Peggy Post notes that many couples think of email or paperless wedding invitations as “practical, thrifty and green.” This may be especially important to an eco friendly couple trying to make a statement.




Evite Cons


The negative connotations that come along with evites are pretty extensive, particularly with your guests who prefer things more old school. The older generation especially will see evites as cheap and impersonal. The use of email and what its acceptable to send this way is still  a grey area in many regards. But, sending evites to the most important day of your life is most definitely considered a taboo to many. Much of the older generation doesn’t use email or wouldn’t know how to access the evite, let alone respond. These preferences are more split along generational lines as your millennial guests will be much more accepting of electronic invitations, but your grandma and her friends- not so much. Because evites are so accessible, they are viewed as less special or not as important and therefore the event can be viewed in that same light. Many people consider evites to be tacky and even plain lazy of the host. Those are the last words you used when describing your wedding! The lack of tangibility can cause guests to forget key details of the event.  Additionally it’s easy to lose the invitation in a crowded inbox and forget the event all together.





At the end of the day it all comes down to personal preference. Every family member and friend will have an opinion on what to do and what would work best or look best but it isn't their decision.


Your wedding and all of your wedding activities that go along with it are just that: yours. The fact that there are two popular and hotly contested forms of wedding invites means that there is obviously a significant following for both sides. People see the pros and cons in both and it ultimately comes down what you think works best for your situation.  Depending on your budget, timeline, style, and overall planning approach, you’ll find the invitation form that fits best for you. And the people following you on social media who aren’t invited to your big day shouldn’t factor into a decision. When all is said and done, your guests who were invited will just be thrilled that they got an invitation to the biggest moment in your life, whether they open an envelope or an email.  





Here are some of our top picks for Invitations & Evites:


Paper Lovers:
  1. Ceci Johnson- one of the top custom luxury wedding invitation designers in the industry https://www.cecinewyork.com
  2. Minted- brings together independent artists to create fresh design ideas for your perfect wedding invitation https://www.minted.com
  3. Etsy- a variety of handmade, custom invitations made by small business owners around the world https://www.etsy.com




Paperless Lovers:
  1. Evite- a large variety of free evites available as well as premium upgrades https://www.evite.com
  2. Paperless Post- a simple and practical invite approach https://www.paperlesspost.com
  3. Punchbowl- a variety of themes and designs for any bridal activity https://www.punchbowl.com




Tell us what you think of this debate in the comments below!


Written by Charlotte Lewis. Charlotte Lewis is the Marketing & Event Planning Intern for Golden Knot Yacht Services, a Yacht Event Planning Company for Weddings, Corporate Events, and Special Occasions in New York City, NJ, Philadelphia, DC, Baltimore, Annapolis, Florida, San Diego, Newport Beach, Marina Del Ray, Hawaii, and the Bahamas. Don’t just float through life, catch some waves.
www.goldenknotys.com



@goldenknotyacht

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